Why You Should Never Drink Alcohol

Johnny has a student who needed hours up in his plane at night so we decided to make a date of it and Johnny and I along with his student and his wife decided to fly to Wendover last night for dinner.

Weekends bring in an interesting crowd, and just about everybody in Wendover is totally drunk. Our night's entertainment was just watching these people humiliate themselves, which gave us even more reasons to never drink.

Reason #1: I was in the bathroom where three ladies came in and began slamming the stall doors and laughing and yelling for everyone to hear, "I can't feel my butt! It's numb!"

Reason #2: On the shuttle bus from the airport there weren't enough seats so a drunk guy offered to share his seat with another drunk guy. All of a sudden, they strike up a conversation loud enough for everyone on the whole bus to hear, "Ya, my wife and I are trying to get pregnant but we can't so I had to go to the doctors and he said my sperm are just swimming around in circles." We were trying so hard not to laugh.

Reason #3: Another drunk guy on the bus started talking about how he was down here having a good time when he ran into his old mission companion. Yikes. And this other guy was down here for the bachelor party of someone Johnny's student knew. Oops, hope his fiance doesn't find out.

Reason #4: Yet another drunk person on the bus, this time a girl, starts yelling at the bus driver (in Spanish because the driver is Hispanic), "Donde esta bano?! Donde esta! Donde!"--where's the bathroom?!

There are plenty of other great stories, but the moral of this one is never drink, people will just make fun of you.